Friday, September 12, 2014

September Blog for Cozy Orange

In our culture, to follow your dreams seems more of a saying and well whishing for others than an action.  I wonder how often Americans actually consider their true desires in life.  Do most people take time to understand the big picture of life? Or does our cultural expectations of college, career, family, house, and monetary successes automatically impede that vision? Maybe it is just easier to be told how to live?
I fell prisoner to the American way of working to live and striving for success until my opinion of success began to change.  I graduated college and hold a BFA, BA in art education, and a M.Ed. in education. I taught high school art full time for five years as well as coached field hockey and catered.  I had few precious moment of free time which were spent rock climbing and hiking with my dog.  Over those five years I noticed my stress level was high, personality spun negative, and I had to work to find moments of happiness.  The last year I taught was when I hit “rock bottom” something had to change. 
I began to really think about myself as a person, my traits, expectations, interests, desires, and needs.  I thought back to the person I was as a kid and a teenager. Always up for an adventure, unafraid of change, and often excited to make big changes.  The outdoors was a place of comfort and the mountains felt like home.  I began to recognize negativity was not part of my true personality and a trait I wanted to shed. 
As I searched within I realized it was time for a big change.  I decided I could change schools and see if that helped or I could resign and go rock climbing for a year. I contemplated what I would need, created a budget, and considered the difficulty of traveling for a year solo. 
I then committed to my decision told my family, friends, and employers I was going to rock climb for a year and live out of my car.  I have learned greatly from that experience about who I am, how simple life can be, and found my definition of success.
I do plan to hold a career again although, not as an educator.  I do not desire a family with kids, but I do desire to grow old with someone and of course multiple dogs.  I do not desire a large house to fill with gadgets and things instead I would love a small cabin in the mountains built with simplicity, style, and eco friendly.  Everything I own fits in my Subaru Impreza wagon and when I stop traveling I do not intend to acquire much more. 
I know it will take constant self-evaluation, desire, and drive to not fall prisoner of our cultural norms when returning to the working world.  However, I refuse to live to work and strive to continue living my dreams and making choices aligning with the person I am. I truly believe when we leave this world we should be capable of saying “I have lived my dreams.”


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